Losing Master...Part III

I awaken and immediately feel confused. Where am I? I look around and see tubes coming from my arms. I have an oxygen mask on my face. I see that I’m hooked to an IV. I hear a steady beep in my ear. It’s coming from a machine that’s hooked up to me. I continue to look around and realize I am alone. I am in the hospital. Ever since I was a little girl, dying alone has always being my greatest fear. I start to panic a little & I hear the beep start to speed up a little. The nurse opens the curtains & tells me that I’m in the hospital and that I’m going to be ok. She states that they are running test and to try and relax and calm down. She removed the oxygen mask from my face & asked if I was able to speak. She asked if I was on any medications that they should be aware of & completed the appropriate hospital forms. She had me sign the forms (which was a task of its own). She gave me some ice chips and asked if I wanted to call anyone. That’s where it hit me…Master had left me. Panic began to strike me again…and the nurse could tell by my facial expression that I was uneasy. She told me to calm down & that she placed the phone beside me on the bed. She then said she would be back shortly but in the meantime to try and relax. I asked if I would be able to go home, she stated she wasn’t sure until all the test had come back. She left the room & closed the curtain back. This wasn’t a traditional room. This was the emergency room where all the patients were separated by a curtain and partitions. I look at the phone and tears began to stream down my face. Should I call Master? Would he care? Or will he hate me even more for contacting me. After lying there and feeling sorry for myself…I decided to call.

Ringgggggg, no answer. 2nd ringggggggg..still no answer. Maybe Master isn’t home. 3rd ringgggggggg..”Hello”, I hear Master’s deep, baritone, masculine voice. And somehow, it comforts me. “Daddy”…I say to him. “________________, where are you? The caller I.D. is registering for ___________ General Hospital.” “Daddy I’m in the hospital & I’m all alone & I don’t know what’s wrong yet”. And as quick as that…”DADDY’S ON HIS WAY SUGA” and he hangs up. Just like that, he hangs up the phone, no arguing, no questions, just a sense of urgency & those five words “Daddy’s on his way”. I feel a sense of comfort. I can breathe. Daddy still cares for me. (Suga is what Daddy used to call me as a pet name when we were in the vanilla world).

Later: I see Daddy enter thru the curtains. He looks worried. He comes in & sits by my bed and says, “don’t worry about anything Suga. Daddy’s right here”. I hear him speaking in the wonderful, comforting, soothing voice of his telling me everything is going to be ok & that he wasn’t going to leave me by myself. I hear him say “I won’t let you die alone”. Suddenly, nothing else matters…Daddy is here and I drift off to sleep.

A few hours later I wake up & see Daddy still at my side. He tells me that I won’t be going home and that I would be spending at least one more night at the hospital. He said I had a mild stroke and that he would be right there for me. I see a tear drop down Daddy’s face & he says, “I’m so sorry Baby, this is all my fault”. This was the first time I’ve ever seen Daddy cry. For as long as I can remember, he’s always been like Superman to me. And here he was, vulnerable, HUMAN even…crying for me. He said he would swallow his pride enough to be there for me and that my health is always more important than anything….to be continued soon

~DovesCagedBird~