It's been so long since I've blogged here. Things are so different than they used to be. Master & I have been thru hell and back but we still have each other. Master thought it was best that I get away from blogging and reading other blogs due to the unrealistice idea that they can somehow teach US how to be the perfect submissive couple. We were both so new into the lifestyle and had eager eyes and tried everything imaginable. I learned alot about myself as a slave and Master as my Master.
After failure after failure upon failure to compete with some of the other slaves, we both realized that we can't compete. Everyone is different in this lifestyle. One slave told me that when I first started blogging & got into the lifestyle. Thank you Married Man's Fuck Toy. You were right, we had to find our OWN way.
One thing we have realized is that the long list of rules I had were just not realistic. Sure...in the beginning, I could do MOST the tasks, but I would end up being punished some way or other for not being able to complete them all. We also had duties that we didn't practice. We decided to cut them out also. My duties are now simple, concise & clear. To SERVE my Master the best I can.
I'm not a masochist & I don't have a high tolerance for pain. I used to beat myself up for not being able to do the things other slaves could do. I couldn't sit still & be spanked with canes & whips. I would yell out my safe word within the first 30 seconds of discipline. I always felt like I was disappointing Master. I'm still not able to do the "fisting" thing as some of you slaves are able to do. No matter how hard I tried. I couldn't bare the pain. I started getting ANGRY at Master and myself for not being able to complete the tasks. I would have temper tantrums & get into more trouble. It finally dawned on us, that this is OUR life. We can't compare ourselves to anyone else. Just because Tracey down the street is able to do things that I can't, it doesn't mean that I don't serve my Master to the best of my abilities. Taking a break away from this place was the best thing I could have ever done. I have grown to be mature in the lifestyle. I take what someone else is doing with a grain of salt. I can never be them, & they can never be me.
Master & I have grown so much closer as tragedy has been rampart in our lives within the past year. I know that i'm treasured by him and it feels so good. I've written in my diary my progress. Hopefully someone else new in the lifestyle will stumble upon my blog & I can be of assistance to them. It has taken me a long time to realize that it's not about me, it's about Master & as long as I make him happy & do my best, he'll always be proud of me.
~DovesCagedBird~
Friday, December 28, 2007
Monday, May 28, 2007
I'm so glad to be back...
First off I would like to thank everyone who has been following my blog. As many of you know Master & I have been going through a very rough time. My baby sister was murderered & within a week his mother passed away. Master decided W/we both needed to just get back to the basics & lick each O/other's wounds. There is so much to tell that I don't know where to start. I will try to catch everyone up as soon as I can. Again, thanks for supporting me, I've been a wreck. I have many naughty updates to cum. ~DovesCagedBird~
Monday, February 26, 2007
Assignment of my sexuality…It’s official…I’m Bi Sexual
I wanted to take some time to reflect and those of you who read my blog an insight into my mind. By now you all should know that Master and I haven’t been in the scene long. I have reached out to a select few of you for help (you know who you are) in becoming the best slut slave I can be.
“You are bi-sexual”…when I heard Master say those words, it took me back to a time and place of confusion, hurt and pain. My Journey into BDSM started from as far as my memories go. I thought back to a time when I didn’t CHOOSE to be submissive. My mind drifted back to me as a child. With Master’s permission, I will begin to post entries of how I got to this place. A place of needing to be wanted, needing to be owned and loved by someone who would never hurt me, a place where I CHOOSE to be owned, a place of complete trust and loyalty.
“You are bi-sexual”…when I heard Master say those words, it took me back to a time and place of confusion, hurt and pain. My Journey into BDSM started from as far as my memories go. I thought back to a time when I didn’t CHOOSE to be submissive. My mind drifted back to me as a child. With Master’s permission, I will begin to post entries of how I got to this place. A place of needing to be wanted, needing to be owned and loved by someone who would never hurt me, a place where I CHOOSE to be owned, a place of complete trust and loyalty.
When I heard those words from Master, I thought back to when I was a young child, around 6 or 7 years old. I remember always having a fascination with women. With the shapes of women’s body, with the way a woman smelled. By now I had long lost my innocence and so my sense of sexuality was very demented and confusing. All I knew was that I hated men and I craved being around women. I remember the few times I got to go visit with my aunties, I would rub their legs and skin & it would feel so soft to me. They would smell so good. Their hair, their skin it made me feel warm and for lack of a better word to use… almost aroused. Because of the abuse in my childhood, saying that my teen and early adult years were confusing is an understatement. (More on this topic later.)
My mind drifted back to the time where I thought I hated men. I was barely 18 & used to be an exotic dancer. For a period of about 3 years, I thought I was a lesbian. The thought of dating a man absolutely disgusted me. I went on several dates but never had the courage to dabble into anything sexually. My attraction to women came from their presence. Women seemed to be warm & soft and to understand me. I didn’t feel like a man could relate and at that time I my hatred over rode any emotions I could ever feel for any man. I remember at the club receiving multiple advances from women. I never felt awkward because I believed I was a lesbian. There were times when I had wet, naught dreams of caressing a woman, smelling their scent and tasting them, fantasies that never quite came into play. Thru the years I came to terms that what I was feeling was a comfort level more so than it being sexuality. Although I’ve always felt women were beautiful, I came to terms with knowing I wasn’t a lesbian.
Although I’ve never had any real sexual experiences with women, I have to say that I’m extremely excited and turned on by the fact that he has chosen for me to be bi-sexual. As Daddy is very anal, I can only imagine the BDSM scenes we will have of me licking multiple cunt’s assholes and wet pussies. I know exactly what is in store for me per his demented and oh so wonderful and wicked desires. I am his ANALBi-sexualpainslutwhorecunt!!! Master and I will be very careful to choose the correct play mates for our scenes but I have to say that I’m wet and extremely aroused just by thinking of it. Master has allowed me to post a couple pictures of myself for the first time. (Coming Soon) This makes his cunt extremely happy.
~DovesCagedBird~
Losing Master...Part III
I awaken and immediately feel confused. Where am I? I look around and see tubes coming from my arms. I have an oxygen mask on my face. I see that I’m hooked to an IV. I hear a steady beep in my ear. It’s coming from a machine that’s hooked up to me. I continue to look around and realize I am alone. I am in the hospital. Ever since I was a little girl, dying alone has always being my greatest fear. I start to panic a little & I hear the beep start to speed up a little. The nurse opens the curtains & tells me that I’m in the hospital and that I’m going to be ok. She states that they are running test and to try and relax and calm down. She removed the oxygen mask from my face & asked if I was able to speak. She asked if I was on any medications that they should be aware of & completed the appropriate hospital forms. She had me sign the forms (which was a task of its own). She gave me some ice chips and asked if I wanted to call anyone. That’s where it hit me…Master had left me. Panic began to strike me again…and the nurse could tell by my facial expression that I was uneasy. She told me to calm down & that she placed the phone beside me on the bed. She then said she would be back shortly but in the meantime to try and relax. I asked if I would be able to go home, she stated she wasn’t sure until all the test had come back. She left the room & closed the curtain back. This wasn’t a traditional room. This was the emergency room where all the patients were separated by a curtain and partitions. I look at the phone and tears began to stream down my face. Should I call Master? Would he care? Or will he hate me even more for contacting me. After lying there and feeling sorry for myself…I decided to call.
Ringgggggg, no answer. 2nd ringggggggg..still no answer. Maybe Master isn’t home. 3rd ringgggggggg..”Hello”, I hear Master’s deep, baritone, masculine voice. And somehow, it comforts me. “Daddy”…I say to him. “________________, where are you? The caller I.D. is registering for ___________ General Hospital.” “Daddy I’m in the hospital & I’m all alone & I don’t know what’s wrong yet”. And as quick as that…”DADDY’S ON HIS WAY SUGA” and he hangs up. Just like that, he hangs up the phone, no arguing, no questions, just a sense of urgency & those five words “Daddy’s on his way”. I feel a sense of comfort. I can breathe. Daddy still cares for me. (Suga is what Daddy used to call me as a pet name when we were in the vanilla world).
Later: I see Daddy enter thru the curtains. He looks worried. He comes in & sits by my bed and says, “don’t worry about anything Suga. Daddy’s right here”. I hear him speaking in the wonderful, comforting, soothing voice of his telling me everything is going to be ok & that he wasn’t going to leave me by myself. I hear him say “I won’t let you die alone”. Suddenly, nothing else matters…Daddy is here and I drift off to sleep.
A few hours later I wake up & see Daddy still at my side. He tells me that I won’t be going home and that I would be spending at least one more night at the hospital. He said I had a mild stroke and that he would be right there for me. I see a tear drop down Daddy’s face & he says, “I’m so sorry Baby, this is all my fault”. This was the first time I’ve ever seen Daddy cry. For as long as I can remember, he’s always been like Superman to me. And here he was, vulnerable, HUMAN even…crying for me. He said he would swallow his pride enough to be there for me and that my health is always more important than anything….to be continued soon
~DovesCagedBird~
Ringgggggg, no answer. 2nd ringggggggg..still no answer. Maybe Master isn’t home. 3rd ringgggggggg..”Hello”, I hear Master’s deep, baritone, masculine voice. And somehow, it comforts me. “Daddy”…I say to him. “________________, where are you? The caller I.D. is registering for ___________ General Hospital.” “Daddy I’m in the hospital & I’m all alone & I don’t know what’s wrong yet”. And as quick as that…”DADDY’S ON HIS WAY SUGA” and he hangs up. Just like that, he hangs up the phone, no arguing, no questions, just a sense of urgency & those five words “Daddy’s on his way”. I feel a sense of comfort. I can breathe. Daddy still cares for me. (Suga is what Daddy used to call me as a pet name when we were in the vanilla world).
Later: I see Daddy enter thru the curtains. He looks worried. He comes in & sits by my bed and says, “don’t worry about anything Suga. Daddy’s right here”. I hear him speaking in the wonderful, comforting, soothing voice of his telling me everything is going to be ok & that he wasn’t going to leave me by myself. I hear him say “I won’t let you die alone”. Suddenly, nothing else matters…Daddy is here and I drift off to sleep.
A few hours later I wake up & see Daddy still at my side. He tells me that I won’t be going home and that I would be spending at least one more night at the hospital. He said I had a mild stroke and that he would be right there for me. I see a tear drop down Daddy’s face & he says, “I’m so sorry Baby, this is all my fault”. This was the first time I’ve ever seen Daddy cry. For as long as I can remember, he’s always been like Superman to me. And here he was, vulnerable, HUMAN even…crying for me. He said he would swallow his pride enough to be there for me and that my health is always more important than anything….to be continued soon
~DovesCagedBird~
Friday, February 16, 2007
Losing Master...Part II
What started out as a typical day, ended in the worst day of my life. i woke up & performed my normal slut morning duties for Master. O/our rules state that when He's not home, i may do as i wish and i've always tried to do right by Master. But on this very day, one bad decision has affected my entire life...
Master went to work and i did my normal house duties. i became quite bored and called Master on his cell & asked if i could try to find a BDSM chat room. Master said it was ok but said the only stipulation was i had to learn something or i wouldn't be able to go back to the chat room. i became so excited. i'm always happy to find other slaves like me. It makes me feel like i'm not alone & i always end up learning something. i search & search & i FOUND ONE. A real BDSM chat room. i was a little nervous because i had never been around other Master's before (except on http://www.theslaveregister.com/ & there's no chatting there) and i didn't want to offend or disrespect anyone. So i put on my best behavior & entered the room. T/they welcomed me with open arms. T/they were all so friendly. The moderator of the room was a submissive. i wont' give her name, but she gave me a list of rules. The rules included always being respectful, never i-m anyone without asking permission in the room first and to have fun. she stated the room was not formal & said i didn't have to chat in 3rd person or address myself in small caps.
It was wonderful. T/they were so nice. Especially the Master's. One particular Master told me that i should put a profile up. i explained i had not been allowed to as of yet but hopefully my Master would allow me soon. He understood. W/we chatted about "fake" BDSM'ers who prey on newbies like me to try and abuse submissives or to just get in her pants. It was so enlightening. Then...out of the blue...i start receiving i-m's. i responded back to the i-m's because they were Master's and i didn't want to be disrespectful or offend anyone. Like i said before i'm very new & i didn't want to embarrass Master. i wanted to make a good impression just in case He decided to chat one day. One particular Master asked me for pictures of myself. i was a little uneasy but his request was simple. i decided i would send him a picture. i figured no harm done. Note: i'm an extremely curvy multi ethnic female. i'm part puertorican, cherokee, african american & irish. Which made up a very interesting "product" to say the least. my body type is what you would call voluptuous with a capital V. i only say this because the Master started getting real "interested" in me after i sent him my picture. He asked for a picture of me in bondage and like a naive slave i sent it. Then it occurred to me that i was about to be in a heap of trouble...i didn't take my face out the picture. my Master would be furious. i tried to get the Master out of my i-m box but he wouldn't leave. i returned into the chat room & informed the moderator. she quickly booted him out of the room. i immediately felt sick to my stomach. i knew i would be punished hard...i just had no idea how hard.
i began to 2nd guess whether i would even tell Master what happened. i know i should never keep anything from Master but i was terrified. Not only is He my Master. He's my Husband & i felt i had completely betrayed Him. i decided to NOT tell Master...worst decision of my life.
Later: Master comes home & i perform my regular slut rituals. He asked about my 1st chat experience & i told Him it was wonderful. i even logged the chat conversation & showed Him. He was very proud of me & told me i did very well. Master had a huge presentation for a major account at work the next morning and had to do some research. He told me to go to bed early because He didn't need any distractions. i happily obliged...off to sleep i went..
i feel my head abruptly jerk back and awake me. i'm disoriented. my hair is being pulled so hard as i am yanked off the bed. "YOU CHEATING SLUT, YOU WHORE!!". Those are the words coming from my Master's angry lips. i'm confused, i have no idea what He's talking about. i look at the clock and it's 3 in the morning. What could i have done to make Master so angry? YOU UNGRATEFUL PIECE OF SHIT..GET THE FUCK OUT OF MY HOUSE!! i see nothing but hatred & hurt in Master's eyes. What did i do? i didn't understand. So i muster up the courage & say, "What's wrong Master?". i feel the hardest slap i've ever felt in my life land on my face & knock me to the floor. my nose starts bleeding and i'm even more disoriented. i can't speak "YOU KNOW WHAT YOU DID & YOU LIED"!!! "YOU FUCKING LIED TO ME". I SAW THE PICTURES YOU SENT THE MAN IN THE CHAT ROOM. YOU GAVE ANOTHER MAN A PIECE OF WHAT WAS MINE WITHOUT ASKING MY PERMISSION. I DON'T WANT YOU ANY MORE. GET THE FUCK OUT MY HOUSE!!!
omg!! Master knows what i did. How could something so innocent be turned into something so horrible. i scream & beg for Master to hear me out, He refuses to listen....
Note: Please read Losing Master Part I to catch up..part III coming soon.
~DovesCagedBird~
Master went to work and i did my normal house duties. i became quite bored and called Master on his cell & asked if i could try to find a BDSM chat room. Master said it was ok but said the only stipulation was i had to learn something or i wouldn't be able to go back to the chat room. i became so excited. i'm always happy to find other slaves like me. It makes me feel like i'm not alone & i always end up learning something. i search & search & i FOUND ONE. A real BDSM chat room. i was a little nervous because i had never been around other Master's before (except on http://www.theslaveregister.com/ & there's no chatting there) and i didn't want to offend or disrespect anyone. So i put on my best behavior & entered the room. T/they welcomed me with open arms. T/they were all so friendly. The moderator of the room was a submissive. i wont' give her name, but she gave me a list of rules. The rules included always being respectful, never i-m anyone without asking permission in the room first and to have fun. she stated the room was not formal & said i didn't have to chat in 3rd person or address myself in small caps.
It was wonderful. T/they were so nice. Especially the Master's. One particular Master told me that i should put a profile up. i explained i had not been allowed to as of yet but hopefully my Master would allow me soon. He understood. W/we chatted about "fake" BDSM'ers who prey on newbies like me to try and abuse submissives or to just get in her pants. It was so enlightening. Then...out of the blue...i start receiving i-m's. i responded back to the i-m's because they were Master's and i didn't want to be disrespectful or offend anyone. Like i said before i'm very new & i didn't want to embarrass Master. i wanted to make a good impression just in case He decided to chat one day. One particular Master asked me for pictures of myself. i was a little uneasy but his request was simple. i decided i would send him a picture. i figured no harm done. Note: i'm an extremely curvy multi ethnic female. i'm part puertorican, cherokee, african american & irish. Which made up a very interesting "product" to say the least. my body type is what you would call voluptuous with a capital V. i only say this because the Master started getting real "interested" in me after i sent him my picture. He asked for a picture of me in bondage and like a naive slave i sent it. Then it occurred to me that i was about to be in a heap of trouble...i didn't take my face out the picture. my Master would be furious. i tried to get the Master out of my i-m box but he wouldn't leave. i returned into the chat room & informed the moderator. she quickly booted him out of the room. i immediately felt sick to my stomach. i knew i would be punished hard...i just had no idea how hard.
i began to 2nd guess whether i would even tell Master what happened. i know i should never keep anything from Master but i was terrified. Not only is He my Master. He's my Husband & i felt i had completely betrayed Him. i decided to NOT tell Master...worst decision of my life.
Later: Master comes home & i perform my regular slut rituals. He asked about my 1st chat experience & i told Him it was wonderful. i even logged the chat conversation & showed Him. He was very proud of me & told me i did very well. Master had a huge presentation for a major account at work the next morning and had to do some research. He told me to go to bed early because He didn't need any distractions. i happily obliged...off to sleep i went..
i feel my head abruptly jerk back and awake me. i'm disoriented. my hair is being pulled so hard as i am yanked off the bed. "YOU CHEATING SLUT, YOU WHORE!!". Those are the words coming from my Master's angry lips. i'm confused, i have no idea what He's talking about. i look at the clock and it's 3 in the morning. What could i have done to make Master so angry? YOU UNGRATEFUL PIECE OF SHIT..GET THE FUCK OUT OF MY HOUSE!! i see nothing but hatred & hurt in Master's eyes. What did i do? i didn't understand. So i muster up the courage & say, "What's wrong Master?". i feel the hardest slap i've ever felt in my life land on my face & knock me to the floor. my nose starts bleeding and i'm even more disoriented. i can't speak "YOU KNOW WHAT YOU DID & YOU LIED"!!! "YOU FUCKING LIED TO ME". I SAW THE PICTURES YOU SENT THE MAN IN THE CHAT ROOM. YOU GAVE ANOTHER MAN A PIECE OF WHAT WAS MINE WITHOUT ASKING MY PERMISSION. I DON'T WANT YOU ANY MORE. GET THE FUCK OUT MY HOUSE!!!
omg!! Master knows what i did. How could something so innocent be turned into something so horrible. i scream & beg for Master to hear me out, He refuses to listen....
Note: Please read Losing Master Part I to catch up..part III coming soon.
~DovesCagedBird~
Monday, February 5, 2007
Nasty Comments...
Before i made any post to my blog, i went to different blogs & introduced myself. i explained i was new to the lifestyle & that i would like some support from others like me. i received some wonderful advice from other Dom/slaves. But the one consistent thing said to me was "you will receive some negative comments" and to take them in stride.
This post is about my 1st negative comment. As i am new to this lifestyle, i really wanted to share my experiences & all my insecurities that came along with being a slave. Master & i are both new. W/we're both learning. On thing that most have told U/us is to make this relationship O/ours. There is no script to follow. And that's what W/we have done. Unfortunately, the going has been EXTREMELY rough. i have a long way to go to become the true slave that i so desire to be.
my comment read as this "you are about as real as a $3 bill". my 1st instinct was to delete this comment. Thoughts of "the nerve" of them to say i'm less of a slave/sub than anyone else? my insecurities of being a good slave returned and in all honesty, my feelings were a little hurt because Master & i are B/both going thru some trying times right now. After talking with Master, He decided to leave the negative comments in the future & to embrace them as any other comment. People will always have their opinion. my goal here is not to prove my authenticity of being a slave, but to find my true self in being a "good" slave.
So thank you anonymous....whoever you were. i appreciate you taking the time to read my blog. i will use your comment as a lesson that i have a long way to go b4 i reach my true inner self.
i would also like to thank everyone who has offered me any advice. It is greatly appreciated.
~DovesCagedBird~
This post is about my 1st negative comment. As i am new to this lifestyle, i really wanted to share my experiences & all my insecurities that came along with being a slave. Master & i are both new. W/we're both learning. On thing that most have told U/us is to make this relationship O/ours. There is no script to follow. And that's what W/we have done. Unfortunately, the going has been EXTREMELY rough. i have a long way to go to become the true slave that i so desire to be.
my comment read as this "you are about as real as a $3 bill". my 1st instinct was to delete this comment. Thoughts of "the nerve" of them to say i'm less of a slave/sub than anyone else? my insecurities of being a good slave returned and in all honesty, my feelings were a little hurt because Master & i are B/both going thru some trying times right now. After talking with Master, He decided to leave the negative comments in the future & to embrace them as any other comment. People will always have their opinion. my goal here is not to prove my authenticity of being a slave, but to find my true self in being a "good" slave.
So thank you anonymous....whoever you were. i appreciate you taking the time to read my blog. i will use your comment as a lesson that i have a long way to go b4 i reach my true inner self.
i would also like to thank everyone who has offered me any advice. It is greatly appreciated.
~DovesCagedBird~
Losing Master...Part I
First...disbelief!! Did i just hear Master say those words? Get out!!! I don't want you!!! Next...an extreme sense of fear. He doesn't mean that... Master promised to keep me, cherish me, love me, mold me forever!!! i desperately look into his eyes while kneeling in front of him. They are empty. Full of disgust!! Disgust for me, His WIFE and His slave. He throws my leash at me, tells me to pack my things & to get the fuck out of His house. He throws $100 at me & says go get a room and get away from Him. Tears are pouring heavily down my face. Anxiety kicks in, i'm desperate. i'm pulling at his feet while he tries to get away from me, begging him to change his mind. i began to cough heavily. He kicks me away & says GET THE FUCK AWAY FROM ME. I DON'T WANT YOU!! i crash to the floor in disbelief. I can't breathe. Every breath feels as if someone is hitting me in the chest with a sledge hammer. i began to cough profusely, saliva begins to run down my mouth & i still can't breathe. i try to catch my breath but i can't. i feel as if i'm going to die right then & there.
He comes over me & removes my collar. He says to me, "you stay, I'll leave" & leaves me there, all by myself. Master knows my greatest fear is to die alone. i panic! Where is the phone, i need to call for help. i began to vomit violently...& a voice in my head says "omg please don't let me die alone". i vomit again, over & over. i can't get up. i can't call for help. i can't breathe. i'm irrational. my inner voice says "Master is gone. If you don't breathe you WILL die alone". i concentrate one second at a time on breathing. i'm still vomiting. Anxiety is still controlling me. my inner voice screams at me "GET IT TOGETHER, BREATHE BITCH OR YOU WILL DIE ALONE"!! and i breathe between the violent vomiting. Next...find the phone, where is the phone? Call for help. my eyes wont focus. everything is blurry. i can't see anything but big blobs of blur. "CONCENTRATE BITCH OR YOU WILL DIE ALONE"!! i concentrate harder to see, between the unimaginable coughs & heaves & vomit. There it is, i can see the phone. It is wayyyy over there!!! Next...drag yourself to the phone & call for help. i feel helpless, i feel myself about to pass out between the coughs & vomiting. my head is pounding, my eyes feel as if they are about to explode out of my head. my head is pounding. DRAG YOUR BITCH ASS ACROSS THE ROOM & CALL FOR HELP OR YOU WILL DIE ALONE!! i call 911...here comes the seizures...again, and again, and again. i hear the voice on the other end, "ma'am, what is your emergency?". i am unable to answer her..."i am dying alone"....and i swiftly drift away into unconsciousness...
Story to be continued soon... ~DovesCagedBird~
Thursday, January 18, 2007
A slaves broken heart...
Trust is so important in this lifestyle. i will pray for faith that whatever is supposed to happen will. ~DovesCagedBird~
Monday, January 15, 2007
Humiliation...Harder than I thought
humiliation (noun)
1. state of disgrace or loss of self-respect
2. strong feelings of embarrassment
3. depriving one of self-esteem
The past few days have been pretty hard for dovescagedbird. Daddy has been extremely disappointed in me as adjusting to the lifestyle has been pretty tough. Dovescagedbird is a strong black woman who is used to speaking her mind without thinking of the consequences. i have experienced so many different emotions over the last few days. Emotions ranging from anger, hurt, low self-esteem, happiness, lust, pain & down right revengeful.
Master expects me to not question him or his intent EVER! But sometimes its hard for me not too. Whenever i feel insecure or that he's wrong, i've expressed this too him. i haven't been able to do it in a respectful way. Master requires me to be naked at all times with a hook in my ass. Sometimes, IT JUST DOWN RIGHT HURTS. When he disciplines me, he expects me to enjoy it, but its very painful sometimes. Master says a slave is supposed to enjoy the things that pleasures her Master, i'm working on it, but discipline isn't exactly fun. i'm doing the best i can. Master has been pretty understanding when it comes to this. One thing Master doesn't tolerate is a quick & evil tongue (which i posess). Master & i B/both agreed no other women in the relationship UNLESS approved by both. my insecurities are getting the best of me. i feel as if i'm not getting enough attention from Master. W/we were together all weekend but because he was upset with me he completely ignored me. i would have rather been punished versus being ignored.
Master expects to yell & talk to me any way he wishes & for me to sit there & take it. It's so hard!!!! He put me in the cage again & left me there for hours!! It hurt me so bad. Talk about humiliation!! i started to question if He really loved me. i started to question if this life style was for me. i started to get revengeful & wonder how He would feel if i caged Him up & made Him eat from a dog bowl. I started to wonder how it would feel if i spanked Him. Then i started to cry because i love Him so much. i want Him to always be proud of me & my progress. Being humble & respectful even when i feel Master is unfair is the hardest thing i've ever had to do. By nights end i apologized to Master & asked for his forgiveness. He accepted & pulled me into his bed and told me He loved me. He explained this life style isn't easy & that it takes time. He also explained i would be punished for my actions but he wants me to really think about if this life style is what i want.
i've come to the conclusion that it is. All i want to do is serve my Master & make Him happy. i want to belong to Him. i love when he flaunts his power & is gentle in the next breath. i'm turned on by it. Nobody ever said this life style was easy. i know Master loves me and would never do anything to intentionally hurt me. i will serve him until the day i die.
This blog entry isn't very specific as the things i went thru the past couple of days is too emotionally close to my heart to do so. i would love to correspond with other slaves & exchange words on how you get thru the different emotions you feel. Thanks for coming by...
1. state of disgrace or loss of self-respect
2. strong feelings of embarrassment
3. depriving one of self-esteem
The past few days have been pretty hard for dovescagedbird. Daddy has been extremely disappointed in me as adjusting to the lifestyle has been pretty tough. Dovescagedbird is a strong black woman who is used to speaking her mind without thinking of the consequences. i have experienced so many different emotions over the last few days. Emotions ranging from anger, hurt, low self-esteem, happiness, lust, pain & down right revengeful.
Master expects me to not question him or his intent EVER! But sometimes its hard for me not too. Whenever i feel insecure or that he's wrong, i've expressed this too him. i haven't been able to do it in a respectful way. Master requires me to be naked at all times with a hook in my ass. Sometimes, IT JUST DOWN RIGHT HURTS. When he disciplines me, he expects me to enjoy it, but its very painful sometimes. Master says a slave is supposed to enjoy the things that pleasures her Master, i'm working on it, but discipline isn't exactly fun. i'm doing the best i can. Master has been pretty understanding when it comes to this. One thing Master doesn't tolerate is a quick & evil tongue (which i posess). Master & i B/both agreed no other women in the relationship UNLESS approved by both. my insecurities are getting the best of me. i feel as if i'm not getting enough attention from Master. W/we were together all weekend but because he was upset with me he completely ignored me. i would have rather been punished versus being ignored.
Master expects to yell & talk to me any way he wishes & for me to sit there & take it. It's so hard!!!! He put me in the cage again & left me there for hours!! It hurt me so bad. Talk about humiliation!! i started to question if He really loved me. i started to question if this life style was for me. i started to get revengeful & wonder how He would feel if i caged Him up & made Him eat from a dog bowl. I started to wonder how it would feel if i spanked Him. Then i started to cry because i love Him so much. i want Him to always be proud of me & my progress. Being humble & respectful even when i feel Master is unfair is the hardest thing i've ever had to do. By nights end i apologized to Master & asked for his forgiveness. He accepted & pulled me into his bed and told me He loved me. He explained this life style isn't easy & that it takes time. He also explained i would be punished for my actions but he wants me to really think about if this life style is what i want.
i've come to the conclusion that it is. All i want to do is serve my Master & make Him happy. i want to belong to Him. i love when he flaunts his power & is gentle in the next breath. i'm turned on by it. Nobody ever said this life style was easy. i know Master loves me and would never do anything to intentionally hurt me. i will serve him until the day i die.
This blog entry isn't very specific as the things i went thru the past couple of days is too emotionally close to my heart to do so. i would love to correspond with other slaves & exchange words on how you get thru the different emotions you feel. Thanks for coming by...
His Slave & LOVING it!!
01/09/07-5th Day as a Slave
this slave awaked & performed the normal oral stimulations to Daddy. I sucked daddy’s dick the best i could. this slave made sure to show enthusiasm & enjoyment while sucking on Daddy’s dick as i learned that a slave is always supposed to show she is pleased to accept her Master is using her. so this slave moaned & groaned & licked up every drop of cum from Daddy. Each time Daddy requested something of me or performed a ritual, i completed it with the same enthusiasm & enjoyment. When Daddy used my mouth (which i learned is called a cunt in slave terms) to empty his cock i took the correct position (on knees, head up, mouth wide and playing with pussy) or as Daddy likes to say “his wet nasty cunt”. i thanked Daddy when i licked his ass, thanked Him when i sucked His dick, thanked Him when i drank his piss, thanked him when He licked my ass, thanked him when He plugged & stretched my ass to almost unbearable measures, thanked Him when he fucked me hard, thanked him when He made sweet love to me, thanked Him for the needles in this slaves ass & nipples, thanked him for the discipline and this slave showed enjoyment in Everything i did. Daddy was very proud of me & told me i was his great slut, whore, bitch and cunt and told me He would never hurt me & leave me. this slave is extremely happy. this slave has never been so secure & felt so love in all of her life.
Today was a great day. W/we completed O/our studies together, added & subtracted things from our list that weren’t needed & feel asleep in E/each O/other’s arms.
Saturday, January 13, 2007
Punishment Versus Discipline
01/08/07 ~ I woke up this morning & performed my normal oral duties to my Master. I told myself today would be a GOOD day & that I would make Master proud of me. We had a long talk today. As Master & I are both new to the BDSW scene, Master assigned me the task of doing extra research on the lifestyle. We would like to attend functions with other couples like us and really stay true to the lifestyle. One of the main things I learned today was that each Master/slave or Dom/sub tweek this life style to fit them. There is no “perfect” way as everyone is different. I also learned that in order for me to visit message boards & so forth that I must learn how to type in a respectful way as a slave. I learned that slaves/subs address themselves in the 3rd person or in lower case letters. They always refer to their Masters/Dom in capital letters & by the title of their preference & to not assume. I will start typing in this way from now on so that I may get practice in. my Master wants me to call him Daddy so this slave will do call Him that from now on. this slave will also address myself as “this slave” or by the name given to me by Daddy "DovesCagedBird".
i also learned that Daddy & i have been a bit confused. There is a difference between Discipline & Punishment. Discipline is to be used so that this slave may become a better slave. It is used to “train” this slave (for lack of a better way of putting it). Punishment is used when this slave has done something that Daddy does not approve of. this slave should always thank Daddy after punishment has been given.
this slave also learned that Daddy & i should have a set Goals, Rituals/Expectations, Disciplines as well as Punishments. These things should be in writing so that there is no confusion. Daddy is free to update these things at any time after discussion & including them. W/we were on the right track when W/we started this lifestyle. W/we just needed some guidance. Daddy and i are currently working on putting these things in writing. See this article for more information: http://www.leathernroses.com/generalbdsm/ravenpunishment.htm
I also learned there are names for specific positions. Daddy has requested that this slave learn these positions and i must say this slave is enjoying all the new information i’m learning. Not only is it interesting, but i get a sense of purpose from them. W/we have decided to incorporate a different contract with B/both of us agreeing to destroy the first contract. this slave also stumbled across set rules for slaves. W/we have decided to incorporate these also with a bit of editing for our taste along with the ritual/rules W/we have already come up with.
When Daddy got home from work this slave was so excited to share what i had learned. Daddy was very eager to listen to this slave. Daddy was proud of me as He is eager to learn also. W/we have decided to study together at least an hour a day on the life style.
Daddy performed the normal sexual & non sexual disciplines on me. this slave performed the normal rituals/rules for my Daddy. He was proud of me & told me that He loved me multiple times. Today was a very good day. i love Daddy so much.
i also learned that Daddy & i have been a bit confused. There is a difference between Discipline & Punishment. Discipline is to be used so that this slave may become a better slave. It is used to “train” this slave (for lack of a better way of putting it). Punishment is used when this slave has done something that Daddy does not approve of. this slave should always thank Daddy after punishment has been given.
this slave also learned that Daddy & i should have a set Goals, Rituals/Expectations, Disciplines as well as Punishments. These things should be in writing so that there is no confusion. Daddy is free to update these things at any time after discussion & including them. W/we were on the right track when W/we started this lifestyle. W/we just needed some guidance. Daddy and i are currently working on putting these things in writing. See this article for more information: http://www.leathernroses.com/generalbdsm/ravenpunishment.htm
I also learned there are names for specific positions. Daddy has requested that this slave learn these positions and i must say this slave is enjoying all the new information i’m learning. Not only is it interesting, but i get a sense of purpose from them. W/we have decided to incorporate a different contract with B/both of us agreeing to destroy the first contract. this slave also stumbled across set rules for slaves. W/we have decided to incorporate these also with a bit of editing for our taste along with the ritual/rules W/we have already come up with.
When Daddy got home from work this slave was so excited to share what i had learned. Daddy was very eager to listen to this slave. Daddy was proud of me as He is eager to learn also. W/we have decided to study together at least an hour a day on the life style.
Daddy performed the normal sexual & non sexual disciplines on me. this slave performed the normal rituals/rules for my Daddy. He was proud of me & told me that He loved me multiple times. Today was a very good day. i love Daddy so much.
Friday, January 12, 2007
Disobedience
01/07/07 -- Day 3 as a Slave
disobedience (noun)
1. the failure to obey
2. the trait of being unwilling to obey
1. the failure to obey
2. the trait of being unwilling to obey
I awakened this morning at 6:15am in my Master’s arms. I was careful not to awaken my Master as I can only awaken him by orally pleasuring him. I proceeded to orally pleasure my Master until he was ready to rise out of bed to get dressed. When my Master was satisfied with my oral stimulation he complimented me & told me I was an excellent slut. I love when my Master compliments me. He told me I was doing a very good job & he was very pleased with me. I thanked Master for allowing me to please him orally. I proceeded to get my Master’s slippers and put Master’s slippers on his feet. My Master then attached the leash so that he may lead me to the bathroom. I followed Master to the bathroom & offered Master my mouth so that he may release his bladder. I tried very hard to not let any of Master’s liquid escape my lips as this is very important to Master. Again, Master complimented me & told me he loved me & that I was pleasing him and I thanked him again for allowing me to swallow his liquids. I proceeded to wash Master and dry him off. Once Master was dried off I proceeded to orally stimulate my Master’s ass until he was satisfied. Again, Master told me I was a wonderful whore. And that he loved his Bitch very much. This made me so happy as I want to be the best cunt my Master has ever had. I thanked him again for allowing me to service him.
Master lead me back into the bedroom and I asked permission to cook breakfast for Master. Master gave permission, removed my leash & proceeded to get back in bed & relax. I humbly presented Master with his breakfast and kneeled at Master’s feet on the floor. I asked permission to speak. Master granted this & I asked if I could wash myself. Master granted permission for me to wash myself and removed the rope & hook inserted in my ass. Once I finished with my bath I went over to Master, spread my ass wide & stated “I offer my ass to you Master”. Master told me to relax and declined ass or cunt stimulation. He inserted a clean hook in my ass & roped my cunt & granted permission for me to eat breakfast. I thanked Master for allowing me to eat.
I crawled to side of the bed by Master and sat on my knees. Master returned my leash & lead me back into the bed. Master told me he loved me & was very happy with me. He granted me permission to speak without permission & to hold a nice conversation with him. Master & I talked for a couple of hours. Master then told me to prepare for an inspection. I was tired & didn’t feel like having an inspection. Master didn’t like this. I proceeded to get in the approved positions. Master removed the hook & rope & searched me thoroughly, spreading my cunt & ass with the speculum. He then told me my ass was extremely tight & that we had a long way to go before it would be to his liking. Master then inserted an ass stretcher, locked it & told me to keep it in. I resisted because my ass was very sore from the hook. Master did not like this & slapped me very hard. He proceeded to tell me to NEVER question his judgement. He told me I would be punished for that. Master proceeded to suck on my cunt and fuck me extremely hard. He then told me to get on all fours & inserted 4 needles in my ass cheeks for being disrespectful & 2 needles thru each nipple. I screamed in agony as I had never had so much pain. Master explained why he was punished me & asked me to explain to him why I was being punished. I told him I was hesitant about one of his decisions & promised to never let that happen again. And I thanked him for my discipline. Master then gently removed the needles. Blood squirted everywhere. I was actually turned on by the sight of the blood. I still don’t quite understand this. But I was still in pain. Master kissed me on my forehead & told me he loved me very much. He proceeded to put peroxide on the wounds and allowed me to go to sleep.
I was eager to prove to Master that I could do better. My goal was to be the perfect slave for Master. It hurts my feelings when I disappoint him. I know now that it hurts him to punish me as he gave me so much love in my aftercare. Mid-day Master was ready to remove my ass stretcher. My ass was so sore. Master assured me it would be better for me in the long run & that I would have to learn to love what pleases him. Master proceeded to replace the hook in my ass & I completely lost it. Just the thought of something else inside me was too much for me. I wanted to use my safe word but I knew better. I told Master No. He directed me several times & told me I would be severely punished later. He told me he loved me & that I was to never tell him no. He proceeded to put the hook in my horribly sore ass and directed me to do write in my journal & some research on being a good slave.
When I was done, I crawled to Master’s feet & asked for permission to speak. I told him what I had learned and he told me he was very proud of me. Master pulled me into bed by my leash & cuddled me. He rubbed his cunt & told me to sleep & rest. It was dinner time when I awakened. I served Master dinner. After dinner Master told me to go to my cage while he thought about the discipline he would give me. I went to my cage without hesitation.
Master released me from my cage approximately 30 minutes later. He then hogtied me & suspended me. He proceeded to harshly whip me until I thought I would pass out. After he whipped me I thanked Master for the discipline. He then proceeded to punish me with needles and extremely rough sex. He whipped my ass, pissed in my ass & proceeded to put a tube in my ass for me to drink the piss out. I accepted my punishment & thanked Master when he was done. Master gently released me from suspension & gave me aftercare. He told me he loved me & he lead me to bed. He told me he was proud of my 3rd day & hoped he would not have to be as harsh tomorrow. He then told me that I needed to call him Daddy at all times unless I’m being punished & only then I should call him Master. He told me I needed to study my rules again & that he would present me with more rules soon. I thanked Daddy for his wisdom & prayed very hard to be a great slave tomorrow.
Master lead me back into the bedroom and I asked permission to cook breakfast for Master. Master gave permission, removed my leash & proceeded to get back in bed & relax. I humbly presented Master with his breakfast and kneeled at Master’s feet on the floor. I asked permission to speak. Master granted this & I asked if I could wash myself. Master granted permission for me to wash myself and removed the rope & hook inserted in my ass. Once I finished with my bath I went over to Master, spread my ass wide & stated “I offer my ass to you Master”. Master told me to relax and declined ass or cunt stimulation. He inserted a clean hook in my ass & roped my cunt & granted permission for me to eat breakfast. I thanked Master for allowing me to eat.
I crawled to side of the bed by Master and sat on my knees. Master returned my leash & lead me back into the bed. Master told me he loved me & was very happy with me. He granted me permission to speak without permission & to hold a nice conversation with him. Master & I talked for a couple of hours. Master then told me to prepare for an inspection. I was tired & didn’t feel like having an inspection. Master didn’t like this. I proceeded to get in the approved positions. Master removed the hook & rope & searched me thoroughly, spreading my cunt & ass with the speculum. He then told me my ass was extremely tight & that we had a long way to go before it would be to his liking. Master then inserted an ass stretcher, locked it & told me to keep it in. I resisted because my ass was very sore from the hook. Master did not like this & slapped me very hard. He proceeded to tell me to NEVER question his judgement. He told me I would be punished for that. Master proceeded to suck on my cunt and fuck me extremely hard. He then told me to get on all fours & inserted 4 needles in my ass cheeks for being disrespectful & 2 needles thru each nipple. I screamed in agony as I had never had so much pain. Master explained why he was punished me & asked me to explain to him why I was being punished. I told him I was hesitant about one of his decisions & promised to never let that happen again. And I thanked him for my discipline. Master then gently removed the needles. Blood squirted everywhere. I was actually turned on by the sight of the blood. I still don’t quite understand this. But I was still in pain. Master kissed me on my forehead & told me he loved me very much. He proceeded to put peroxide on the wounds and allowed me to go to sleep.
I was eager to prove to Master that I could do better. My goal was to be the perfect slave for Master. It hurts my feelings when I disappoint him. I know now that it hurts him to punish me as he gave me so much love in my aftercare. Mid-day Master was ready to remove my ass stretcher. My ass was so sore. Master assured me it would be better for me in the long run & that I would have to learn to love what pleases him. Master proceeded to replace the hook in my ass & I completely lost it. Just the thought of something else inside me was too much for me. I wanted to use my safe word but I knew better. I told Master No. He directed me several times & told me I would be severely punished later. He told me he loved me & that I was to never tell him no. He proceeded to put the hook in my horribly sore ass and directed me to do write in my journal & some research on being a good slave.
When I was done, I crawled to Master’s feet & asked for permission to speak. I told him what I had learned and he told me he was very proud of me. Master pulled me into bed by my leash & cuddled me. He rubbed his cunt & told me to sleep & rest. It was dinner time when I awakened. I served Master dinner. After dinner Master told me to go to my cage while he thought about the discipline he would give me. I went to my cage without hesitation.
Master released me from my cage approximately 30 minutes later. He then hogtied me & suspended me. He proceeded to harshly whip me until I thought I would pass out. After he whipped me I thanked Master for the discipline. He then proceeded to punish me with needles and extremely rough sex. He whipped my ass, pissed in my ass & proceeded to put a tube in my ass for me to drink the piss out. I accepted my punishment & thanked Master when he was done. Master gently released me from suspension & gave me aftercare. He told me he loved me & he lead me to bed. He told me he was proud of my 3rd day & hoped he would not have to be as harsh tomorrow. He then told me that I needed to call him Daddy at all times unless I’m being punished & only then I should call him Master. He told me I needed to study my rules again & that he would present me with more rules soon. I thanked Daddy for his wisdom & prayed very hard to be a great slave tomorrow.
Becoming His...
Day 2 as a slave: (01/06/07)
submission (noun)
1. the act of submitting; usually surrendering power to another
2. the condition of having submitted to control by someone or something els
Today my master gave me an outline of some of my duties. I signed a contract and I agreed to all the terms of my duties and this contract.
Expectations:
· My ONLY concern is to serve my Master & make sure he is happy. I shall keep him happy at ALL times and when I don’t he shall discipline me to make me a better slave.
· I am to wake up every morning at least 15 minutes ahead of my Master to provide oral stimulation to my Master. He is to awake to oral stimulation without delay every single morning. I will perform this stimulation to My master until he directs me to stop.
· I must bathe my Master every day before he goes to work & when the shower is finished I am to dry my master off & lick his ass until it is thoroughly pleasured.
· Each time I clean myself I am to find my master, spread my ass, put my ass in my master’s face & offer my ass to my master. My direct words shall be “I am offering my ass to you master”. My master will do as he chooses to my ass. If there should be company at the house, I am to call my master into the bedroom & still offer my ass to him each & every time I clean myself. There shall be no exceptions.
· I shall be collared & leashed at all times unless directed by my Master to take my collar off.
· I shall have spontaneous inspections of my Master’s cunt and ass. My cunt and ass is to be cleaned, groomed, and look exactly as my Master wishes it to be at all times. I must spread myself wide in the approved positions for inspections. Approved positions include laying on my back spread wide for cunt inspections and on all fours for anal inspections. Inspections will include the speculum.
· My Master will stretch my ass daily as he is grooming my ass to be fisted easily.
· My daily wardrobe shall be picked out by my Master everyday. Until he picks out my clothing, I shall remain naked.
· I will always wear a rope in my ass and cunt as my Master wants his cunt to look a certain way. This shall only be removed when I am using the bathroom or directed to remove it by my Master.
· I must only speak when given permission to speak. I must crawl to the foot of my Master, sit on my knees and ask to speak. I must always look up at my master directly in the eyes when speaking to him so that he may see the intent in my heart.
· If my master has to piss I must first offer my mouth to my master. If Master wants to use my mouth as his toilet I will assume the appropriate position of head up, mouth open wide & masturbate my cunt until Master is finished pissing. I must drink all of Master’s piss and thank him for using my mouth & for his liquids.
· I must never question my Master.
· I must never say no to my Master
· I must accept all punishments from my Master willingly & without hesitation.
· I will have a safe word
· I will have aftercare when I am disciplined
· I must thank my Master for my discipline.
· I must fuck my Master whenever, however, wherever he wants to fuck me.
· I must allow my Master to suspend me whenever he feels the urge to. My suspensions are to be at his discretion & I must trust my Master enough with my life.
· I am to call my Master “Daddy” at all times unless I’m being disciplined. When I am being disciplined, I am to call him Master.
· When my Master says “bitch come here”, I must crawl to my Master’s feet & hand him my leash.
· My Master will decorate & mark my body & I have to accept his decorations & markings without hesitation as my body is his canvas.
· I must have all household chores completed before my Master gets home. My only chores include cleaning the house & cooking. I am also to do at least an hours worth of research on BSDM & tell my Master what I have learned when he gets home from work. I am free to do whatever I want when my Master is not around. This is because he loves me.
· I am to welcome my Master home from work on my knees, head down & ass spread wide in case master wants to use me.
· I must always ask Master before I do anything concerning myself. This includes eating, sleeping and using the restroom.
· I am to offer my liquids to my Master first and if he declines I must as for permission to use the restroom. If master says no, then I will piss on myself.
· When I am ready for bed I must crawl to the side of the bed & offer my leash to my Master. Master will then pull me into the bed by the leash if he allows me into the bed.
· I am only allowed to get up 2 times during the night to use the restroom. I still have to ask Master may I use the restroom & he is free to decline. After he approves 2 times I must not wake him & piss on myself.
· I must never remove my leash unless Master unlocks it.
· I must never wear underwear unless approved by Master.
· I must never take orders from any other Master other than mine. If another Master needs something from me, I must direct them to ask my Master so that he may approve.
· If I go a week without any discipline, my Master will serve me breakfast in bed on Saturday mornings.
· Finally, I must never lie to my Master.
If any of these rules are broken, my Master may discipline me as he chooses. I have no voice when it comes to discipline. I do have a safe word & I may use my safe word when I feel my health is being jeopardized only. Otherwise, I must accept my discipline & thank my Master for my discipline when he is done. My Master has told me up front that he will have a harsh hand when it comes to discipline. Therefore, he spells out his rules clearly so that I may have control over whether I am disciplined or not.
Disciplines: My disciplines shall be mild or corporal. They shall include but are not limited to the following…
· Suspensions
· Sodomy
· Perverse insertions
· Water play
· Humiliation
· Forced enemas - he may use any liquid he wishes
· Whippings – he may whip me as he sees fit. Which may include drawing blood
· Needles
· Hot wax
· Slaps
· Fucking machines
· Jack hammer fucking
· Piss – he may piss on or in any part of me that he chooses
· Choking
· Being caged
· Titty & cunt weights
· Speculums
· Humiliation
· Fire
· Electro shock
· Knives (my Master would never permanently scar me)
· Swords
· Hooks
Note: My Master is not an Abuser, I must trust & know that he will never put my life in danger. His goal is to teach me a lesson. I must never look my Master in the eye when he disciplines me. I must thank my Master for my discipline. I must never commit the same transgression more than once or my discipline will be even more severe.
I was able to successfully complete my 2nd day as a slave. My Master complimented me all day on what a good cunt, bitch, slut, whore I was and we went to bed cuddling. I have never been this happy.
~Doves_Caged_Bird~
submission (noun)
1. the act of submitting; usually surrendering power to another
2. the condition of having submitted to control by someone or something els
Today my master gave me an outline of some of my duties. I signed a contract and I agreed to all the terms of my duties and this contract.
Expectations:
· My ONLY concern is to serve my Master & make sure he is happy. I shall keep him happy at ALL times and when I don’t he shall discipline me to make me a better slave.
· I am to wake up every morning at least 15 minutes ahead of my Master to provide oral stimulation to my Master. He is to awake to oral stimulation without delay every single morning. I will perform this stimulation to My master until he directs me to stop.
· I must bathe my Master every day before he goes to work & when the shower is finished I am to dry my master off & lick his ass until it is thoroughly pleasured.
· Each time I clean myself I am to find my master, spread my ass, put my ass in my master’s face & offer my ass to my master. My direct words shall be “I am offering my ass to you master”. My master will do as he chooses to my ass. If there should be company at the house, I am to call my master into the bedroom & still offer my ass to him each & every time I clean myself. There shall be no exceptions.
· I shall be collared & leashed at all times unless directed by my Master to take my collar off.
· I shall have spontaneous inspections of my Master’s cunt and ass. My cunt and ass is to be cleaned, groomed, and look exactly as my Master wishes it to be at all times. I must spread myself wide in the approved positions for inspections. Approved positions include laying on my back spread wide for cunt inspections and on all fours for anal inspections. Inspections will include the speculum.
· My Master will stretch my ass daily as he is grooming my ass to be fisted easily.
· My daily wardrobe shall be picked out by my Master everyday. Until he picks out my clothing, I shall remain naked.
· I will always wear a rope in my ass and cunt as my Master wants his cunt to look a certain way. This shall only be removed when I am using the bathroom or directed to remove it by my Master.
· I must only speak when given permission to speak. I must crawl to the foot of my Master, sit on my knees and ask to speak. I must always look up at my master directly in the eyes when speaking to him so that he may see the intent in my heart.
· If my master has to piss I must first offer my mouth to my master. If Master wants to use my mouth as his toilet I will assume the appropriate position of head up, mouth open wide & masturbate my cunt until Master is finished pissing. I must drink all of Master’s piss and thank him for using my mouth & for his liquids.
· I must never question my Master.
· I must never say no to my Master
· I must accept all punishments from my Master willingly & without hesitation.
· I will have a safe word
· I will have aftercare when I am disciplined
· I must thank my Master for my discipline.
· I must fuck my Master whenever, however, wherever he wants to fuck me.
· I must allow my Master to suspend me whenever he feels the urge to. My suspensions are to be at his discretion & I must trust my Master enough with my life.
· I am to call my Master “Daddy” at all times unless I’m being disciplined. When I am being disciplined, I am to call him Master.
· When my Master says “bitch come here”, I must crawl to my Master’s feet & hand him my leash.
· My Master will decorate & mark my body & I have to accept his decorations & markings without hesitation as my body is his canvas.
· I must have all household chores completed before my Master gets home. My only chores include cleaning the house & cooking. I am also to do at least an hours worth of research on BSDM & tell my Master what I have learned when he gets home from work. I am free to do whatever I want when my Master is not around. This is because he loves me.
· I am to welcome my Master home from work on my knees, head down & ass spread wide in case master wants to use me.
· I must always ask Master before I do anything concerning myself. This includes eating, sleeping and using the restroom.
· I am to offer my liquids to my Master first and if he declines I must as for permission to use the restroom. If master says no, then I will piss on myself.
· When I am ready for bed I must crawl to the side of the bed & offer my leash to my Master. Master will then pull me into the bed by the leash if he allows me into the bed.
· I am only allowed to get up 2 times during the night to use the restroom. I still have to ask Master may I use the restroom & he is free to decline. After he approves 2 times I must not wake him & piss on myself.
· I must never remove my leash unless Master unlocks it.
· I must never wear underwear unless approved by Master.
· I must never take orders from any other Master other than mine. If another Master needs something from me, I must direct them to ask my Master so that he may approve.
· If I go a week without any discipline, my Master will serve me breakfast in bed on Saturday mornings.
· Finally, I must never lie to my Master.
If any of these rules are broken, my Master may discipline me as he chooses. I have no voice when it comes to discipline. I do have a safe word & I may use my safe word when I feel my health is being jeopardized only. Otherwise, I must accept my discipline & thank my Master for my discipline when he is done. My Master has told me up front that he will have a harsh hand when it comes to discipline. Therefore, he spells out his rules clearly so that I may have control over whether I am disciplined or not.
Disciplines: My disciplines shall be mild or corporal. They shall include but are not limited to the following…
· Suspensions
· Sodomy
· Perverse insertions
· Water play
· Humiliation
· Forced enemas - he may use any liquid he wishes
· Whippings – he may whip me as he sees fit. Which may include drawing blood
· Needles
· Hot wax
· Slaps
· Fucking machines
· Jack hammer fucking
· Piss – he may piss on or in any part of me that he chooses
· Choking
· Being caged
· Titty & cunt weights
· Speculums
· Humiliation
· Fire
· Electro shock
· Knives (my Master would never permanently scar me)
· Swords
· Hooks
Note: My Master is not an Abuser, I must trust & know that he will never put my life in danger. His goal is to teach me a lesson. I must never look my Master in the eye when he disciplines me. I must thank my Master for my discipline. I must never commit the same transgression more than once or my discipline will be even more severe.
I was able to successfully complete my 2nd day as a slave. My Master complimented me all day on what a good cunt, bitch, slut, whore I was and we went to bed cuddling. I have never been this happy.
~Doves_Caged_Bird~
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